Going Green
December 15, 2009 @ 7:46 am | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Beanie, upon tasting (and loving) her first green smoothie: “This has liquified my distaste for spinach!”
Archive for the ‘These People Crack Me Up’ Category
I Blame the Godmother
December 1, 2009 @ 7:34 am | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
What happens when you read one of Karen’s posts aloud to your husband in front of the small fry?
The three-year-old decides “Feral Squirrel” is a perfect nickname for her baby brother, that’s what.
This Could Go on Forever
Wonderboy: My hearing aids aren’t working.
Me: Oh, are your batteries dead?
Wonderboy: Huh?
Me: Do you need new batteries?
Wonderboy: What?
Me: Come here, let me check your hearing aids.
Wonderboy: I think my batteries got dead.
(And yes, we can communicate in sign language as well, but during this conversation I was holding a plate in one hand and a giant slice of pizza in the other. Priorities.)
Literalist
October 26, 2009 @ 8:14 pm | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up, Wonderboy
A conversation reported to me by the 14-year-old:
Wonderboy (looking at book): “Biscuit is spelled B-I-S-C-U-I-T.”
Jane (hiding book): “That’s right! What does B-I-S-C-U-I-T spell?”
Wonderboy: “Biscuit!”
Jane (still hiding book): “That’s right! How do you spell Biscuit?”
Wonderboy: “With letters!”
Indeed They Do
October 23, 2009 @ 6:29 am | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Overheard: the three-year-old exclaiming over the nine-month-old, “Oh, they just grow up so quickly!”
Good Listener
During yesterday’s evening tidy, Jane asked Wonderboy to put a pair of shoes away in the cubby.
Wonderboy, as many of you know, is hard of hearing. Even with his hearing aids in, he cannot pick up soft unvoiced consonant sounds such as those made by the letters C and T.
Which may explain why, this morning, we discovered that pair of shoes in the kids’ bathroom—in the tubby.
Like Mother, Like Blogger
September 29, 2009 @ 7:19 am | Filed under: Snippets, These People Crack Me Up
Jane shares my relish for a good little-kid story and often emails me choice snippets of conversations she has overheard. This one made me laugh out loud for real (LOLFR?).
Rilla, AKA ‘mommy’: “I want a lollipop!”
Beanie: “No, you’re too sick to have a lollipop.”
Rilla: “But I WANT one!”
Beanie: “Oh, fine, here’s one.”
Then she pulled out an invisible lollipop.
And Rilla said: “No! I want a RED one!”
Rilla-My-Rilla
August 27, 2009 @ 7:04 pm | Filed under: Rilla, These People Crack Me Up
All my best Rilla material—the stories and quotes I want to save forever—winds up on Twitter and Facebook these days. (That’s the fastest way to jot something down.) But just in case Twitter goes kaboom someday, I think I’ll start a Rilla-page here for easy future memory-laning. Like most three-year-olds, she is one funny little monkey.
***
Rilla, drinking water from a mug, asks if we can pretend it’s coffee.
Me: “Sure! How is your coffee, ma’am?”
Rilla: “I don’t like coffee.”
***
Rilla: “Mommy, can we have a babysitter named Daphne?”
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Rilla chirps, bouncing: “Mommy! I’m going to free mini-Hawk Girl from the dungeon!”
Rose explains: “She means buy it on Amazon.”
***
Rilla deposits terrifyingly lifelike snake on my feet, announces: “It won’t eat me. ” Pries open rubber jaws, peers inside. “See? It won’t.”
(She sounds disappointed.)
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Rilla names letters on cereal box: “L-I-F-E.”
Scott: “What’s that spell?”
Rilla: “Butterfly!”
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Rilla’s question of the day: “Which people bounce?”
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July 22nd. She just came in carrying a small wicker picnic basket. Knelt, opened basket, carefully spread napkin on floor, took out A BOWL OF CEREAL.
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July 17th. “Mom, what’s your favorite color? Choose red.”
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July 13th. Rilla has spent the past 20 sitting in an armchair licking a little piece of Japanese candy with all the intensity her 3yo self can muster.
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Spent the last two hours wearing a necklace on my head as crown because I am (so Rilla declares) Mommy Princess. Forgot about it until I leaned over the dishwasher and it fell in.
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July 9th. Rilla found reading big fat YA novel. “This is my faborite book.” 3 minutes later, book is cast aside in disgust. “I don’t like it. It has WORDS.”
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July 8th. Overheard—
14yo: “Do you need help pouring the milk?”
3yo: “Nope.”
14yo: “Are you sure?”
3yo: “I don’t want to be sure.”
***
(a work in progress)
Most Important Meal of the Day
August 17, 2009 @ 8:04 am | Filed under: Rilla, These People Crack Me Up
Me: Are you ready for breakfast, honey?
Rilla: Yes.
Me: What would you like?
Rilla: Pizza crust.