Archive for the 'These People Crack Me Up' Category
November 23, 2007 @ 7:26 pm | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Beanie, on the subject of Oscar Mayer weiners: "Are they named after Oscar Wilde?"
November 21, 2007 @ 7:21 am | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Ramona just added another eight years to my life.
If I were to make one of her mom’s Thanksgiving centerpieces, I’d have to put Ramona’s picture there for sure, right next to my Beanie’s. Between the two of them, I could live another three hundred years.
November 6, 2007 @ 7:48 am | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
"What if God really made a Great Pumpkin? What do you think he would look like?"
October 12, 2007 @ 12:47 pm | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
"Mom, can you buy me a bow and arrow? I need one."
September 13, 2007 @ 7:45 pm | Filed under: Books, Family Adventures, These People Crack Me Up
I’m washing dishes, and I pick up a spoon that looks, at first half-attending glance, like it’s covered with applesauce. I begin to wipe it off in my sudsy water, but it isn’t applesauce after all; it’s gooey and greasy and clings to my fingers, rather like…Vaseline?
"What’s on this spoon?" I ask the three girls at at the breakfast table.
"Vaseline," confirms Rose, all nonchalance.
"And why, may I ask?"
She is matter of fact, as if anyone with sense ought to have known without asking. "I was playing Rowan of Rin
Well, okay then.
(*Technically, I think the Death Sleep bit comes into Rowan and the Keeper of the Crystal
(I miss the old covers, the ones with young Rowan on them.)
September 7, 2007 @ 7:29 am | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Why do mother opossums dread rainy days?
Because the children have to play inside!
Heh.
August 15, 2007 @ 8:17 pm | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Beanie, after listening to a discussion of the Assumption of Mary, shakes her head in bewilderment and says: "I’ve just never understood it. It has always been a mystery to me."
July 23, 2007 @ 10:22 am | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Beanie brings me a handful of tiny bits of Sculpey, delicately pinched at each end. "It’s taffy, Mommy! Here are the flavors: blueberry, strawberry, lemon, lime, orange, cherry, and corn."
July 20, 2007 @ 3:42 pm | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
Any mother worth her salt knows to never, never ask a young artist, "Is it a (fill in the blank)?" You’re supposed to say, "Ooh, I like your sculpture; can you tell me about it?" and let the child’s conversation enlighten you as to the identity of the object she has so enthusiastically and inscrutably rendered.
I, however, have never claimed to be worth my salt. Which is why I am prone to exchanges like this one:
Me: "Ooh, what a great Sculpey lemur!"
Beanie: "Mom. It’s not a lemur. It’s a panther."
Whoops.
July 12, 2007 @ 2:49 pm | Filed under: These People Crack Me Up
"You just take some raw meat, and plop some jam on it and smush it up. Then it’s perfect."
